Feelings of unworthiness lead us to overcompensate. We rush around frantically trying to do more until we cannot possibly go on, believing that if we make ourselves indispensable with endless productivity, then maybe we will finally feel we are worth a damn. We never do. No matter how much we accomplish, despite all the praise we receive, we just never feel good enough. Those feelings of unworthiness follow us around. Why aren’t we alone enough?
On this topic, Anne Wilson Schaef writes:
“When we are addicted to working, being busy, rushing around, and taking care of other people, the only way that we can give ourselves permission to rest is by collapsing.
It has been said that workaholism is the addiction of choice for those who feel unworthy. We are so driven to prove ourselves and to make a place for ourselves that we can never quite do enough, no matter how much we do. If we just do enough, maybe we can justify our existence. We have trouble accepting that just our being may be enough.
We all need solitude, and those of us who do too much can only justify taking it when we are near collapse.
Rushing and then collapsing is not only exhausting to me, it wears everyone around me out too.”
We exhaust ourselves with all this frantic busyness. Our endless drive to succeed is not healthy, and it takes a toll on our mental as well as physical health. We can’t rest until our work is done, and it is never done. We always feel incomplete and unsatisfied. Our mistake lies in thinking those feelings come from the outside and can be changed from the outside. We must change within. We have to learn to be satisfied with ourselves to feel complete exactly as we are for our obsession with work and achievement to abate. When are we going to finally learn that we alone are enough? It is terrible to feel unworthy of our existence, especially when we have so much to offer the world. People seem to like us. Why can’t we like ourselves? The fact that we are alive here today is a miracle onto itself. We are worthy, despite our shortcomings and flaws. We are only human after all. Each one of us has something to contribute to the world, whether we acknowledge it or not. Our being here is enough. We are enough.