January 10 – Juggling Projects/Negativism

Rarely if ever do I stop to acknowledge my own success. My eye is always on the future and what I still have yet to achieve. This is a very dissatisfying way to live, and at the height of my anxiety, I recall recounting in despair, “Why am I so unhappy! I have so much to be grateful for, and yet I feel glad for none of it.” Much of my unhappiness lies in my inability to credit myself for my accomplishments.

clouds cloudy countryside farm

On the topic of juggling projects, Anne Wilson Schaef writes:

We workaholics are the type of people that see a glass half-empty instead of half-full. It is much easier to see what we haven’t done than it is to see what we have done.

Often, if we just stop and take stock, we have really accomplished quite a bit. In fact, we probably have been a wee bit close to the edge of working wonders.

Unfortunately, we miss the opportunity to marvel at our wonders because we have so much set up still to do that we what we have done pales into insignificance in relation to what is (always!) yet to be done. Ugly is in the eye of the beholder.”

This is so true. At work especially I am prone to seeing only the very long list of tasks I have before me, rather than the significant progress I have made. When I stop to really consider what I have done though, I realize that I am far more productive, competent, and capable than I give myself credit for. I am also a better friend and family member than I think. I tend to focus on my shortcomings because I believe if I give myself too much credit, I will lapse into a state of mediocrity and stagnation. My love of learning and desire for constant improvement prove this to be a false notion though. Being happy does not equate to giving up on life. Far from it; being happy actually makes our lives worth living. I am working on not only cutting myself some slack, but also giving myself more credit where credit is due. I am a wonderful person, and I do a lot for others.

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